Quick Cheat Sheet to online dating

Online dating.

It used to be treated like touching one's self. Sure, lots of people do it, but for the love of God, don't ever admit it. Well, I have a surprisingly high shame threshold and I am going to out myself. I ... am... an online dater. Phew, now that's out of the way let me tell you a few things I've notice whilst man shopping. Oh, and he doesn't know it yet, but Imma have my guy friend do the lady counterpart list at later date. (Special thanks to him, for allowing me to use his photo.) So here goes. This is mostly in or around OKCupid, because it's free and I'm as cheap as I am lazy.

Photos:

Extreme closeup- fat
Smirks, serious emo faces, general unhappiness- Fucked up teeth.
More than one cat picture- Gay
Smoking- pretentious

Looking for:

"Short term relationships" - Casual sex
"Activity partners"- Casual sex
"Long term activity partners"- Casual sex
"Casual sex"= Someone to make out with in their mom's basement